How to Speak Up in Meetings Even When Your Heart’s Racing
Practical strategies for women who know their content but freeze in high-stakes meetings. Learn to speak calmly and confidently with executive presence.
Dr Sarah Alsawy-Davies
11/6/20252 min read
You’ve been there — sitting in a meeting, idea ready, heart pounding.
You rehearse your sentence in your head, waiting for the right moment… and then someone else says it first.
You leave frustrated, thinking, “I should’ve spoken up.”
But the problem isn’t lack of preparation — it’s your nervous system’s response to visibility.
Why Speaking Up Feels So Difficult
For many women, the fear of speaking up isn’t about the room.
It’s about being seen.
When your brain equates visibility with risk, your body triggers the same physiological reactions as danger — rapid heartbeat, shallow breath, mental blanking.
This is why logical strategies (“just be confident”) don’t work.
You can’t outthink a biological response. You have to retrain it.
The Psychology of “Freezing”
Under pressure, your brain’s amygdala hijacks your thinking centre (the prefrontal cortex).
You momentarily lose access to memory, language, and creativity.
It’s a protective reflex — not a personality flaw.
When you learn to regulate that system, confidence stops being something you perform and becomes something you embody.
Grounding Before You Speak
Try this before your next high-stakes meeting:
Feet flat, spine tall. Feel the weight of your body supported by the ground.
Breathe slower than you think you need to. A long exhale signals safety to the brain.
Focus your gaze softly on one person as you speak. This calms your visual field and projects connection.
These micro-adjustments instantly shift your energy from nervous to neutral.
The Language of Authority
Authority doesn’t mean aggression — it means clarity.
Replace these common softeners:
“I just think…” → “I recommend…”
“Maybe we could…” → “Let’s consider…”
“Sorry, but…” → Delete entirely.
Your tone communicates certainty before your words do.
Creating Psychological Safety — For Yourself
When you embody calm leadership, you unconsciously give others permission to do the same.
Meetings become less about performance and more about contribution.
That’s true executive presence — the quiet confidence that invites trust.
How Coaching Builds Communication Mastery
In Speak With Authority Coaching, we retrain both the nervous system and the language patterns that shape perception.
You’ll learn to:
Speak clearly under pressure
Lead discussions without over-explaining
Project warmth and authority simultaneously
Reframe fear as energy and influence
Ready to Command the Room — Calmly?
If your voice deserves to be heard, it’s time to retrain your system to support it.
Book your free strategy call